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User blog:StormyWormy/The Breakfast Wars
Note: This might not have the perfect formatting, or whatever. Most of these ideas were from Bobcat, and a couple of them from Waffle, and maybe one from me. I do not take credit for the story. It is all Bobcat. I might've edited a few things, but the story is still the same. Bobcat is a fantastic writer. These are the ideas that started the story: Mid-Rebellion, Olavan finds true love... or so he thinks. Until another comes along. Olavan will be forced to decide... * And to keep himself and Greenhaven alive * Who will survive the Coffee Games? * Or should it be the Caffeine Games? * No its the breakfast drink games * Then Orange Juice gets a starring role * He'll be like, * President Tea * hot chocolate is that one guy that dies first * But keeps being reborn, just to get killed again * milk will be slaughtered by a wild pack of rice krispies halfway in * That super well known person that no one likes (water Yes, the cereal gang will team up on milk and fruit loops will lead them * But he'll take them down with them But his treacherous second in command, Lucky Charms Is plotting to overthrow Fruit Loops * cinnamon toast crunch will be milk's first victim * before milk dies at the hands of coco puffs * He is the sole surivor of the "Cereal Bowl Massacre" Lucky Charms that is * So after the great Cereal Bowl Massacre Now, for the real story... Fruit Loops staggers out, Covered in Cereal dust and splashes of milk Only to be confronted by a rouge team of fruit juice Apple Juice holds Fruit Loops's arms while Orange Juice interrogates him, Cranberry Juice takes minutes While Grape Juice just sits over in the corner; Nobody likes Grape Juice When Fruit Loops has spilled all the beans Mango Juice muders him While Lemonade runs to the capital To report on the Cereal Bowl Massacre The Fruit Juices get all the credit But on their way out of the celebration for their heroic acts, Toast steps out of the shadows "My brother, Cinnamon Toast Crunch died in that cereal bowl" The Fruit Juices looked at each other uncertainly "I watched what happened, what REALLY happened." Toast continued Butter stepped up behind Toast and cracked her knuckles Grape Juice gulped But everyone ignored him Everyone always ignores Grape Juice Toast smiled crookedly "Now you will pay" At a flick of his fingers A group of jellys and jams leaped in the Juice's way "Please!" Orange Juice begged looking at Orange Marmalade "We're third cousins! I'm family!" Orange Marmalade just lauged And cut him down Another brutal murder took place The only survivor out of the Juices was Grape Juice Because no one remembered to kill Grape juice, No one cares about Grape Juice Grape Juice stumbled off into the night, forever scarred by the vicious attack Toast was looking the other way, Butter had caught his attention The way she had destroyed Apple Juice? So hot. The only one to see Grape Juice go was Grape Marmalade. She watched silently as he stumbled off. And wished her third cousin a speedy escape But now she was leaving her family's past behind her She was a fully initiated Member of Toast's Gang And there is no going back At that same moment Across the country Eggs looked up Scrambled Eggs had joined him at the lookout tower Next to her was Poached Eggs And next to him was Boiled Eggs And next to them was Fried Eggs And next to her was little baby Easter Egg Behind them all stood Deviled Egg But we don't talk about him He was going through a rebellious stage Boiled doesn't have a gender. Egg pointed at the nearby camp. "There they are." Fried eggs looked up in worry. "Who?" Egg scowled and raised the eyeglass to his eye again. "The Bacon Brothers themselves." Easter Egg huddle against Poached Egg. Deviled Egg rolled his eyes. "Whatever." Scrambled Egg rasied her hand. "Who exactly are the bacon brothers?" She asked. Everyone turned to stare at her. Except for Fried Eggs, who had already been doing that. Egg nodded. "Newbie." He commented to Boiled Egg. Boiled Egg sighed and shook their head. "Newbies." Fried Egg quickly helped Scrambled Egg. Fried Egg would do anything for Scrambled Egg. "Well," He began, pushing his glasses up to his nose. "The Bacon Brothers are the group of Bacon that have been terrorizing the countryside for years." He enjoyed seeing Scrambled Egg's full attention on him. "The include Hickory Bacon, Applewood Smoked Bacon, Bacon Bacon, and of course..." Here Fried dropped his voice. "...Canadian Bacon." Easter Egg whimpered and closed her eyes. Deviled Egg swept his fringe out of his eyes for the fifth time in the last 30 seconds. "You guys are so lame." Everyone ignored him. Like usual. Scrambled Eggs seemed to be the only one unaffected by the name of the dreaded Canadian Bacon. "Who?" She asked, tilting her head and gazing at Fried Egg intently. Fried Eggs found that he could not speak. All that came out was a whimper. Seeing the young egg's distress, Egg cut in, "Candadian Bacon is a terrible bandit. He has been terrorizing this land for years now." Poached Egg pitched in, "His younger brother, Bacon Bacon, is no better." Deviled Eggs checked his phone. "The only reason that he isn't equally well known as his brother is because he was sicko n the day of the Terrible Griddel Accident of '09." Scrambled Eggs looked confused, "Huh?" "Oh yes, a cold. A rather nasty one at that." "No, no, what Griddle Accident of '09?" Fried Eggs found that he could speak, now that Scrambled Eggs was not looking directly at him. Shyly looking down at the floor, he began, "That was the day that the grease fire began, roasting Pancakes, Bacon, and Eggs alike. It was tradgedy enough, but that's when Canadian Bacon struck. Striding through the flames, he began striking down breakfast items left and right. Nothing could have stopped him. He would have killed until there was no one left to kill, if Water hadn't stepped in right then." All the Eggs muttered. Water was well known, but disliked member of the Breakfast Nation. "However, she had been heroic that day, so the Capital had no choice but to officailly declare her a member of the Breakfast Foods and Beverages United." Water had been preening ever since, annoying other citizens such as the Eggs, who felt her position as a breakfast item was pure technical, and that Water had no place at the breakfast table. Fried Eggs opened his mouth to continue the story, when he made a poor decision. He looked up. Fried ''Eggs had been managing to keep his cool around Scrambled Eggs up to this point by fimly staring at her shoes when he addressed her. However now he had made eye contact, that reserve had fled him, leaving him a stuttering mess. Scrambled Eggs kneeled down and put her hand on his knee in concern, which only made things worse for Fried Egg. He looked into her face only inches away from his, and everything suddenly snapped. Scrambled Eggs watched in horror as he melted into a puddle of goo at her feet. Whirling around she demanded "Why isn't anyone doing something?!" Egg watched without concern. "Oh, he'll be alright in a day or two. This sort of thing happens when he leaves his yolk uncooked." Poached Egg leaned down and poked the puddle. "I told him to cook it this time, especially after what happened the last time he forgot!" ''"The last time?" Inquired Scrambled Eggs. "You don't want to know." Easter Egg nodded empathetically. Clapping his hands together, Egg drew everyone's attention back to the telescope. "What are we going to do about the Bacon Brothers though?" Poached Egg snapped her fingers together, "You know, that would make an amazing game!" "Super Bacon Bros!" Egg shook his head. "Sorry Poached, but it will never catch on." She sighed and shrugged her shoulders, "You're probably right.” A loud splat sounded from the battlement "Oh no!" cried everyone, rushing over to the area. Except for Deviled Egg, who was scrolling through his snapchat, radiating teenage angst. Egg lay on the ground, a large arrow protruding from his back. At the end of the arrow, a letter was attatched. Boiled Egg cautiously leaned down to pick it up. Flipping it over, they gasped. "What is it, what is it?" Poached Egg demanded. Wordlessly, Boiled Egg showed everyone the seal. It was two "B"s, back to back. Scrambled Eggs shook her head "No, no, no. Don't go making assumptions. That arrow could have been shot by anyone, not just the Bacon Brothers." "Who then?" Demanded Boiled Egg shaking in fear. “"Uhhhhhhh. The Baloney Babes, the Beastly Broccoli, the Boiling Beans, you know!" “"Not a thing!" cried Poached Egg, mentally noting Baloney Babes down for later. That had a nice ring to it. "I understand what you're saying, but have you smelled it yet?" Scrambled Egg took it confusedly, and raised it up to her nose "It smells like..." "Like?" prompted Poached Egg. “Scrambled Egg looked at the small group, fear in her eyes "...like... bacon” Easter Egg gasped and buried her face against Boiled Egg's leg. Boiled Egg looked down at her. “"Why do we have you anyways? You aren't a proper egg, and all you do is gasp and whimper at dramatic moments" Easter Egg raised her tearstained face and grinned cheerfully, displaying an artistically rendered missing tooth. "Exactly! Egg hired me for...what did he call it. Dra-dra-dramatic effect" Poached Egg nodded wisely. "A very good call on his part. Every story needs a sobbing five year old" With a heart rendering wail, Easter Egg ran to Poached Egg, arms outstretched/ "Very effective dear" said Poached Egg, picking up the little egg. Easter Egg winked at Scrambled Egg over Poached Egg's shoulder "Well...now that that's been...sorted out, can we get onto the letter?" said a weak voice from the ground. All the eggs whirled around, as Fried Egg slowly got to his feet. "Fried Egg!" exclaimed Poached Egg. “"We hadn't expected to see you for at least 12 more hours!" Scrambled Eggs gave Fried Egg a blinding smile, and walked ttowards him, hand outstretched to help him up. With a groan, Fried Egg collasped again. Glancing around guiltily, Scrambled Eggs backed away. "Yeah, he does that" commented Poached Eggs, rubbing Easter Egg's back. Easter Egg smiled toothsomely at Boiled Egg, and stagewhispered, “"I SHIP IT" Flushing red, Scrambled Eggs hurridly cracked open the seal to the letter and read it out loud. "Hugs and kisses, the Bacon Brothers" "Guess they did do it after all" remarked Poached Egg, transferring Easter Egg to her other arm. “"Wait, there's a bit more..." Scrambled Egg muttered peering at the paper. With a angry snort, the slim Egg threw down the paper. "What's it say?" demanded Easter Egg. The only response was an angry toss of the head and a snort from Scrambled Egg. Easter Egg jumped down out of Poached Egg's arms and held the paper up to the light. "Who's the new girl up there standing next to Fried Egg? Me and Applewood Bacon was just thinking what a fine couple they'd make" “"Oooooooooh" crooned Poached Egg and Boiled Egg in perfect unison. A storm of iron tipped arrows clattered against the battlement. Flaming red, Scrambled Eggs snatched the note out of Easter Egg's hands, and ran inside. The remaining Eggs followed, Poached Eggs dragging Egg, Boiled Egg pushing the puddle of Fried Egg along, and Easter Egg bringing up the rear skipping merrily and humming to herself. The clang of a grappling hook sounded loud against the stonework. Momentarily forgetting her guilty daydream about Fried Egg, Scrambled Egg darted outside. Depositing their charges inside the fortress, Poached and Boiled Egg brought her up. Canadian Bacon himself dragged himself over the balcony, leering evilly at them. A deafening clang of iron on stone followed, and within seconds, all of the Bacon Brothers were standing on the battlement, gripping steel weapons. With a cry of fury, Boiled Egg rushed forwards, swinging a broadsword. An easy flick of the wrist left them sprawled on the floor, out cold. Gritting her teeth, Poached Egg dived at the defiant figures, wielding a bo staff. She too, lay cold within seconds. Scrambled Egg closed her eyes. She was the Egg Battalion's last hope. Glancing back at the puddle that was Fried Egg, she made up her mind. She would do this for him. For her. For them. In seemingly slow motion, Scrambled Eggs picked up a jousting lance. Time seemed to stop, everything else blurred as she picked up speed, running at the lead figure standing over Poached Egg. One second later, she was out cold. The feared Bacon Brothers stood, facing down one small Easter Egg standing alone over the unconscious bodies of her comrades. Easter Egg began to shake. Her small hand pulled a pair of nunchucks from Poached Egg's belt. The Bacon Brothers watched in confusion as the tiny egg strode toward them, a fire burning in her little eyes. With a scream of fury, everything went black. And then red. Scrambled Egg sat up shakily an hour later, rubbing a huge bump on her head. Realizing she was still alive, she looked around in stunned silence. All the other eggs, besides Easter Egg were still out cold. Speaking of Easter Egg, where was she? Forgetting all of her previous annoyance with the small Egg, she leaped up, vision blurring. Where was she?! Relief sounds like a five year old singing about daffodils and butterflies, Scrambled Egg soon found out. Walking around the corner of the battlement, she found Easter Egg cheerfully cinching the last knots on Canadian Bacon's wrists. She could only stare. All ten of the Bacon Brothers were passed out, huge lumps covering their foreheads. Applewood Bacon seemed to have a tiny handprint bruised onto his leg, while Canadian Bacon had a small dandilion thoughtfully shoved up his nove. However, when Scrambled Egg looked at Easter Egg, the five year old was apparently unarmed. She couldn't have knocked out all of the Bacon Brothers, Scrambled Eggs Decided. It simply was not possible. Easter Egg heard Scrambled Eggs approaching, and looked up. She smiled her innocent smile and ran to give the older Egg a hug. Scrambled Eggs sighed internally. Easter Egg was not an overpowered ninja warrior. The Bacon Brothers were in their custody. And Fried Egg? Well, that remained to be seen. But until then. All was right with the world. With an expert toss, Easter Egg threw her nunchucks into a potted plant. She would retrieve them later. They could come in handy. Scrambled Eggs did not see this, and held the small Egg to her, laughing in relief. The rest of the eggs stumbled around the corner. Seeing Scrambled Egg and Easter Egg over the Bacon Brothers, they too grinned in relief. None of them asked Easter Egg what happened. If they did, she wouldn't have said. Sometimes, she had decided long ago, it's better to have a secret weapon on your side.But all that could wait. She had a mission. Skipping over to Fried Egg who had resolidified, she dragged him by the hand over to Scrambled Egg. The two older eggs looked blankly down at the smaller egg who was grinning eavily and rubbing her hands together. “Now… let's she what happens next, shall we?” Category:Blog posts